2 posts tagged “vibe”

Man I'm so totally bored. It's a friday night and everyone is out having fun ( I assume), and I'm just sitting at home. Awake by myself with thoughts running through my mind. I realize I'm not as secure as I thought I was. I am always questioning myself and wondering if what I do or say is wrong, too much, not enough, etc. I hate coming off a certain way to people even though I know who and what I really am. I'm not ashamed of myself and yet I fear that others will be. Why am I like that? Why can't I just be confident and sure of myself and not worry about other people's perceptions? It's not even that I care what other people think, it's CERTAIN people I worry about. People that I'm close to but not close enough where they know me good. Does that make sense? Like friends or family that I don't see very often. I don't want them to see me in a way that makes them not respect me anymore. But I don't wanna be fake just so they will. You know? I'm at an age where this shit shouldn't even bother me but it does. Oh well. I know I'll get over it quickly and move on just like every other issue I've had. They come and go.

Speaking of impressions, you ever notice how when you're around certain individuals you get this 'vibe' from them and instantly know you don't like them? I get that alot when I'm around people. Some people I'm drawn towards, not in a physical sense, but rather a spiritual way. Like I just KNOW they're good people and I feel happy around them. Then there's those people that make me feel creeped out or stand-offish from the get go. I stay the fuck away from them. Well lately I've noticed it from others towards me. I can sense it when some people look at me, their eyes tell me they really don't like me. lol it's funny. I never get offended, I just know that spiritually we don't connect at all. The way I dress always draws a certain reaction. Most of the time I get an attitude from others like they're somehow 'above' me and I'm just a ghetto mess. hahaha and when I dress decent, damn do I get treated better everywhere I go. It's fucked up. Like today, everyone was being super nice to me everywhere I went. Maybe I looked like I had money, or I looked 'safe'. Most of the time I look poor and like I'm gonna kick someone's ass I guess. When I was in Cali, some lady approached me and my sister and asked if we could escort her to her hotel room so people would leave her alone. It was crazy.  I don't know, I'm just rambling on and on...gotta find something else to do. 

Check out this widget from SocialVibe.com. It's really cool because it raises money for a cause of your choice. The way it raises money is by how many profile views you get. You can paste it on your MySpace, Facebook or any and all other profiles you might have. The more views you get, the more points you receive. The more points you receive, the more money Social Vibe AND a brand of your choice, called a sponsor, will donate to your chosen cause. So I advise everyone who reads this to get one!

 Check out the site!